In the stillness of your bed, where all is static and unmoving, and you feel that you're the only one there, all alone wrapped in your blanket, I want you to remember that I am always with you, by your side.
In the non-stop whirring of your thoughts, from A to Z they whiz by, when you feel that they are becoming overwhelming and seem to exert their effects onto you, I want you to remember that I am always here, a listening ear.
I strive to be the best for you,
but my failures seem to be more significant.
My heart in my throat,
I look back and feel disappointed in myself.
Anger gels with sadness,
but the emotions in you take precedence.
I want to take care of you,
and I really do, I mean what I say.
All I can ask and hope for,
is that you will give me another chance.
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I always tell you that I have voices in my head that express their disappointment or anger at me when I have done something wrong, my story being me doing Math in secondary school. I take it as a good sign that as I made my long walk back home, past the blocks and up the bridge, my inner voice was blasting me non-stop.
I have been selfish, as I said, always making you feel guilty for wanting something which I don't, I regret that. I have been tactless, for not seeing how my words were affecting you, how your eyes dip down when I talk.
I say this with a very heavy heart, and I mean every word that I say, I am sorry, I seek your forgiveness and I hope that you can give me one more chance to redeem my words. My inner voice only comes out when it senses that I am doing something wrong when I should be doing it right. You. I want to make you right, and that is why my inner voice has spoken, cos I have not been doing so, and right now, I really want to. Please.
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